The Same Old Story

My general problem is overthinking. Whenever I have a decision to make, I think about it for a ever. No matter how small the problem is.

The problem is that I never come to a satisfying or even nearly satisfying result. I don’t find a good solution no matter how long i think about it. There are always cons and insecurities and I can’t weigh them out. I don’t know which risks to take and which risks I should avoid.

There is never going to be a perfect solution without any cons.

Recently I got into a huge argument with my boyfriend. We decided on something and it was my job to execute it. But I was too afraid to do it. What if something would go wrong and we wasted money? So I hesitated and postponed this decision. A couple days later my boyfriend asked me if I did it or not? He was mad at me, not for being a scared chicken, but for not doing what we agreed on and backing out of it behind his back.
I can totally understand why he was mad at me. I was mad at me too!! Why do I always have to overthink everything?

The problem is that in some situations it is necessary to overthink something. Sometimes it’s not good to jump in conclusion and make decisions spontaneously. So when is it appropriate to take your time?

In the end I did what we agreed on but because I hesitated and wasted a couple days, we lost some money. For me this was an important experience. It showed me that overthinking everything is not a solution. It also showed me that I’m part of a team and don’t make solo trips. If we decide on something as a couple we should stick to it and trust each other. During the discussion everyone can voice out their opinion but once the decision was made and agreed on, we should carry it out.

This is my update to the rather cryptic “post” I recently made. When I wrote the headline Wie mans macht, man macht es falsch… i was so disappointed of myself that I couldn’t find the right words. But I still wanted to document the moment on my blog. It documents what being too careful can destroy.

I justed wanted to make everything right.

Update: In the end I was partly right with my overthinking. My boyfriend didn’t listened to my concern and made a mistake himself… I’m so confused!! What is right??


8 thoughts on “The Same Old Story

  1. It use to be the same story for me as well. But with time and through self awareness, my decisions got quicker and better. Not too quicker, since I sit with myself and only focus on the decision that I need to take. Know what I want and what will be feasible for everyone else also.Then decide. It’s mostly came out to be right. I feel happy that I am decisive now.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. maybe there are no such things as “right” oder “wrong” decisions? who can say, which decision is better? better for whom? better from what point od view? i also often do not know, what to do. for me it helps to wait some days because I tend to decide too spontaneously. but after two or three days, i just do something and then wait for life to continue. (according to joh lennon: life is what happens while you make other plans)

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  3. Pingback: Wie mans macht, man macht es falsch… | life as julia

  4. Pingback: July Recap | 2017 | life as julia

  5. You aren’t alone with your problem! When I for example want to buy a pretty dress for a birthday I nearly have to go in every store in the mall, so that I can be perfectly sure I buy the prettiest dress. Because when I find one I will think “Oh but what is when I am going to find in another store a prettier one.” I am so bad at making decisions! Story of my life haha 😂😳

    Liked by 1 person

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